You have some leads and now it’s time to put in effect all the dating tips you’ve gotten from friends, family or the internet! Read below and see how many of these did you already know.
- Perspective is EVERYTHING
It’s easy to get consumed on finding the right one but, you need to be able to separate. Get some you time! Since you are single, this time should be about you and your mind, body and soul. Focus on your career and your relationships with family and friends. Be honest with yourself and with those you’ve matched with. Know your flaws, your match might find your flaws attractive!
- Be Genuine
Be present in the moment. If you overthink or get stuck in your own head, you miss out on getting to know the person and truly immersing in the experience itself. Show curiosity – it shows interest. Again, don’t get stuck in your head asking questions you should be asking out loud. Don’t fake being genuine. If you find yourself acting out of your element, perhaps you shouldn’t pursue the relationship any further. Make sure you are actively listening. There’s nothing better when you’re able to recall a story they’ve mentioned especially if it’s from the first date! - Have fun!
Dating does not have to be like a job fair, singles event, or speed dating. There are other ways to have fun on a date. Choose an activity that you wouldn’t mind doing by yourself. You guys can volunteer for a charity, local shelter, animal shelter, etc. You can sign up for cooking or dance classes. You can go for a hike, visit a museum or go for wine tastings. Use the internet to search for local events happening in your area. Just have fun! - Rejection is Okay
Most people avoid meeting new people for the fear of rejection. It isn’t that bad! If you’ve been rejected, it’s okay because you both have saved a lot of time, effort and energy. Don’t take it personal. Take it as a learning experience to reflect on any problems that need to be corrected. Acknowledge how you feel, do not suppress them so you can move on from the experience. - Trust the Process, Trust in Yourself
Trust is not an easy characteristic to come by. Sometimes trust is hard to earn due to past situations of being betrayed, abused or insecurities. However, it can be built over time as that genuine connection is nurtured. If you are suffering from trust issues, fear will control your intimate relationship. It’s important to talk to a therapist or maybe a support group to identify the origins of mistrust. - Red Flags are a No-Go
Faith and prayer have gotten you this far, if you start to notice some red flags, continue to pray on it but know what to look for. Automatic Red Flags: Controlling, Cannot Commit, Alcohol Dependent, Constantly Distracted/ Disinterested in You, Jealous about External Relationships, Exclusively Sexual, No Alone Quality Time. These are only a few examples of possible red flags. It’s important to identify these and decide if it’s time to reconsider. - Nurture the Relationship
Just like anything, hard work and dedication will reap benefits. An investment is something you put time, money, energy in to with the expectation that it will increase ten-fold. A relationship is the same way. Invest in it and it will grow. Communication is key – speak about your fears and desires. Expressing yourself is the only way you’ll be able to understand each other. Disagree? It’s okay to disagree but it’s important to resolve conflict without degradation. Be open minded – you are growing as an individual and collectively together which means your relationship in the beginning may be different later on. Change can be good and is healthy.
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. ~ Isaiah 41:10
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